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7.Arthur: I am your king.
Peasant: Well I didn't vote for you.
Arthur: You don't vote for kings.
Peasant: Well how'd you become king then?
Arthur: The Lady of the Lake, her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water, signifying by divine providence that I, Arthur, was to carry Excalibur. THAT is why I am your king.
Dennis/Galahad: [interrupting] Listen, strange women lyin' in ponds distributin' swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony....You can't expect to wield supreme executive power just because some watery tart threw a sword at you.
(this is the ringtone I have playing when my Music Man calls me, and it cracks me up every time)
"Bravely Bold Sir Robin/rode forth from Camelot/
He was not afraid to die/O brave Sir Robin/
He was not at all afraid to be killed in nasty ways/
Brave, brave, brave, brave Sir Robin!
He was not in the least bit scared to be mashed into a pulp/
Or to have his eyes gouged out and his elbows broken/
To have his kneecaps split and his body burned away/
And his limbs all hacked and mangled, brave Sir Robin!
His head smashed in and his heart cut out/
And his liver removed and his bowels unplugged/
And his nostrils raped and his bottom burned off/
And his penis split and his--"
King of Swamp Castle: Guards, make sure the prince doesn't leave this room until I come and get him.
Guard: Not to leave the room... even if you come and get him.
King: No, no. *Until* I come and get him.
Guard: Until you come and get him, we're not to enter the room.
King: No, no, no. You *stay* in the room, and make sure *he* doesn't leave.
Guard: And you'll come and get him.
King: Right.
Guard: We don't need to do anything, apart from just stop him entering the room.
King: No, no. *Leaving* the room.
Guard: Leaving the room, yes.
King: All right?
Guard: Right. Oh, if, if, if, uh, if, if, uh, if, if, if, we... oh, if... oh...
King: Look, it's quite simple. You just stay here, and make sure he doesn't leave the room. All right?
Guard: Oh, I remember, uh, can he leave the room with us?
King: No, no, no, no, you just keep him in here, and make sure...
Guard: Oh yeah, we'll keep him in here, obviously, but if he had to leave, and we were with him...
King: No, just keep him in here...
Guard: Until you, or anyone else...
King: No, not anyone else. Just me.
Guard: Just you.
King: Get back.
Guard: Get back.
King:All right?
Guard: Right, we'll stay here until you get back.
King: And make sure he doesn't leave.
Guard: What?
King:Make sure he doesn't leave.
Guard: The prince?
King: Yes, make sure he doesn't leave.
Guard: Oh, yes, of course.
[Points at Guard #2]
Guard: I thought you meant him. You know, it seemed a bit daft me I were to guard him when he's a guard.
King: Is that clear?
Guard: Oh, quite clear. No problems.
King: Right.
[King of Swamp Castle turns to leave the room, both guards follow him]
King: Where are you going?
Guard: We're coming with you.
King: No, no, no. I want you to stay here and make sure *he* doesn't leave.
Guard: Oh, I see. Right.
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